Home

I've made it home, safe and sound! One of the greatest things I've heard in a really long time was the first thing over the PA system in Dulles airport, "Dear US citizens, welcome home to the United States of America". It was so great and refreshing to hear, especially after my super long and painful airplane ride.

But I'm currently at my dad's house and loving the freedom. I've finished my school assignments and all of my school stuff, so my brain is shutting down for the next two weeks. I got to decorate everything for Christmas today and it's brought so much happiness for me. Nothing gets me excited more than a winterwonderland of christmas decorations. (And it's pretty gorgeous, if I do say so myself).

I'm looking forward to all of my time in America: relaxing, spending time with family and friends, and the occasional bad-for-me snack (I'm trying to be good with my diet). If I get to see you, I'm excited.. if I can't, then it'll happen in the summer, I hope!

Merry Christmas!! (if I don't get to write again before then)

Desire and Patience

God has been teaching me a lot about desire lately, but mostly about the patience that comes with those desires. There are so many things that I want out of life, so many things that I want to know that I just haven't figured out yet. Yet, God still tells me to be patient and wait. I was in a particular state of craziness yesterday about all these desires. They all hit at once and I kept asking God, "When will I know X?" or "When will I figure out Y?" It was frustrating. BUT, God was faithful like always. Literally at the half way mark of my run, my ipod died. Coincidence? I think not. I used that time that I had running home to lay it all out on the table for God and just say "God, I have no idea- you do this".

The best part about this run (and I love when God does this in general) is that He really slapped me in the face with some Scripture. I had been reading and attempting to memorize four verses on waiting and patience over the past week or so and God finally just hit me with them and was like, "You've been reading and reading these...now here...embrace them." It was the encouragement I need. Not to say that I'm not still struggling with relinquishing control and I'm still a rather impatient person, but I'm working hard at keeping these Scriptures close to mind.

"I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry" -Psalm 40:1
"Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are those who wait for him!" -Isaiah 30:18
"I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope" -Psalm 130:5
"Wait for the Lord, be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord" -Psalm 27:14 (My favorite out of all of them)


ALSO- I go home for Christmas in FOUR days!!!!

Less Drug Induced This Time...

So Thanksgiving was last week and I wanted to recap for you, but with less over the counter medication blazing through my veins. Thanksgiving was awesome. I got to spend it with a bunch of Americans who brought a traditional American dish. They went all out too and even used stuff they brought from the States. We even got to stream the Macy's Day Parade and the football game. It was quite the epic and delicious day, I must say.

2 WEEKS UNTIL I'M HOME FOR CHRISTMAS!!!

I can't convey how excited I am. It's going to be busy and crazy and I'll probably be tired as all get out, but I am so so so so so excited to see family and friends and just be refreshed from time in American... as short as that time is. I hope that I get to talk and see everyone while I'm home. If not, please forgive me ahead of time.

Mostly, this post is just for me to tell you guys how good God is. I've been going through a REALLY rough time the past few months, but I have to say that I have never grown so much spiritually in my entire life. God has been there through every single step of the way and I am so thankful. Even those days when the last thing I want to be is thankful for the trials in my life. But, I've also been learning what it means to be joyful. Sure, I've been happy for the majority of my life, but I'm really exploring and discovering what it means to have the joy of Christ in my heart even on the crappiest days. Knowing that no matter what is thrown at me, I have the God of all creation on my side and defending me, loving me, and protecting me through it all. It actually brings tears to my eyes thinking about.

Our God is so big and so good and I think that I forget that most of the time. Sure, when people ask me about God I can say, "He's awesome" or "He's the best ever" but I never really sit to reflect on the depth of that. God really IS awesome and he really IS the best ever. Yet, I take it for granted so much. It's no wonder that I'm going through such times. God has been patiently waiting for me to make these discoveries for the past 23 years and I never really grasped the depth of it. Only now, in the most difficult times of my life, are my eyes really open to my amazing, loving, everlasting God. God is teaching me what it means to love, to be loved, to be broken, and a new definition of grace. He's done this by completely wiping away everything I thought I knew and teaching me from scratch. It's hard, yes, but this is something that I believe every Christian should pray for in their life. I've never been so intimate with God and I wouldn't change it for the world... literally.